Four more great, goofy examples of spam this week. Exhibit A:

From: Nanette Bailey
Date: Saturday, March 13, 2010 8:15:22 PM
To: [email address]
Subject: Get a diploma for a better job.

BECAUSE YOU DESERVE IT! Is your lack of a degree holding you back from career advancement?
Are you having difficulty finding employment in your field of interest because you don’t have the
paper to back it up – even though you are qualified?
If you are looking for a fast and effective solution, we can help!
Call us right now for your customized diploma: Inside U.SA.: 1-718-989-5740 Outside U.S.A.: +1-718-989-5740.
Just leave your NAME & TEL. PHONE # (with country-code) on the voicemail and one of our staff members will get back to you promptly!

Yeah, that’s exactly how you get ahead in life—a fake diploma from a fake school. Because employers never check into that sort of thing. Show ’em a piece of paper, and that’s good enough.

Exhibit B:

From: irina@ctfree.net
Date: Saturday, March 13, 2010 12:12 PM
To: [email address]
Subject: Hello

Hello, I Russian girl – a dream to live abroad, my name is Ira, can we get started? I’m on this dating site – Come to me.  http://gelopefuv.kogaryu.com/babagy.html

The dry-and-jolly trees are making noise

This is not a tempting offer, Ira. I wouldn’t visit that website on a dare. What is that bit of nonsense at the end? Z’at haiku or something?

Exhibit C:

From: atlanticmotors@verizon.net
Date: Monday, March 08, 2010 8:59 AM
To: [email address]
Subject: Russian Anna

I the most beautiful. I Russian girl. Estimate my photo. You want dialogue?
http://hytygocew.s-enterprize.com/urofinaq.html

hy  g zf

No, I most certainly do not want dialogue. What blows my mind here is the “from” address. Atlantic Motors?

Exhibit D:

From: Seymour Epps <quotes-slc@allianceu.com>
Date: Friday, March 05, 2010 11:08 PM
To: [email address]
Subject: Changing careers but lack the right Degree?

AFFORDABLE ONLINE BACHEL0R’S, MASTER’S & DOCT0RATE DEGREES

Add Bache1or’s, Master’s or Doctorate Degrees to your resume in just 4-6 weeks and open avenues to promotion and better jobs!

At your Own Pace!
At your Own Schedule!
At your Own Convenience!

No Examination!
No Study!
No Class!

Regardless of your location, you can receive a degree in your desired field. All you need is sufficient knowledge, military, or professional experience and you are on your way to an instant degree in your relevant field.

Earn a recognized University Degree based on professional experience within a few weeks!
Get your desired degree on the basis of your Prior Knowledge and professional Experience.

Give us a call NOW!

+1-801-461-5023
Please leave us your:
1) Your Name
2) Your Country
3) Phone No. with country code if outside USA

We will get back to you ASAP

Another diploma mill. You know what legitimate offers from legitimate companies don’t do? Replace letters in certain words with numbers (“Bache1or’s”) to slip past spam filters

What was really interesting about this one was that they had inserted super-small (1.5 font size) garbage text into the middle of a lot of words. The text looked normal when you opened the message in a mail reader, but if you pasted it into Notepad, all this in-between junk showed up.

So, a line that looked like it said, “Regardless of your location, you can receive a degree in your desired field” was actually, “Regar fwtz dless of your loca yzyozt tion, you can rec b eive a degree in your de rcm sired field.” This is another thing legitimate companies don’t do.

Then again, legitimate companies also don’t offer fake diplomas.

That’s all for this week’s edition of “Ridiculous Spam Friday.” Until next time, keep hitting that “delete” key!